Compassion is empathy in action. It is the ability to put yourself in someone else's shoes and understand the pain, happiness, or any other feeling that they might be going through. The "in action" part refers to you expressing the support that you would have liked to receive in that same situation. In a way, you are experiencing or alleviating the struggle or joy with them. I find that most of us are compassionate to others. We know how to show up for people when they are in need. Whether it is when someone close to them passes away or they are celebrating a major milestone. We create a safe space for the connection to strengthen. This is through our thoughts, feelings and actions towards this person.
Showing Compassion To Myself
For the most part, we are respectful and caring toward others but lack that same support when it comes to ourselves. The most important person you will ever spend time with is yourself. It is harder to be kind, caring, understanding, and even patient with ourselves because of our internal thoughts. We have conditioned beliefs that we have internalized to define who we are. These beliefs have been cemented in our mind and cause us to believe things that aren't true.
In order to develop our ability to show self compassion we can follow three steps. The first step is to notice. First, notice and become aware of the negative thought or feeling you are having about yourself. Second, shift your perspective around the thought or feeling. Third, rewire, repeat this same process anytime you notice a negative thought or feeling and eventually you will "rewire" or lay down a new layer of cement but this time, they will be positive beliefs.
Practice
Think of a time when you felt deeply cared for, when someone was showing you compassion. Sit with that feeling and notice how it makes your body feel. When you have a negative feeling notice how it makes you feel and remember the moments someone showed you compassion. Shift your perspective and give yourself those same words someone else gave you, to make yourself feel deeply cared for. Rewire, continue this practice every time you feel negative feelings toward yourself. After repeating this process consistently, eventually you will begin to change the relationship you have with yourself and rewire those negative beliefs.